So, Barnaby and I had just taken off into the sunset in some asshole's boat so to speak, and, figuring on my mind's picture of the land, I guessed we were either headed to Connecticut, or Rhode Island. The question facing us now was what do we do when we get there? Barnaby and I figured that, even though we could see lanterns twinkling on the other side of the drink, it'd be in our best interests to make tracks north, so's to get closer to home and to throw off the law who'd be waiting for us on the other side. Lucky for us, Barnaby discovered a cooler on the boat, stocked with enough beer to tide us over for as long's we pleased. Judging by the sun, I figured we had at least two more hours daylight to travel, 'fore we started running the risk of ramming something or other. So, we just kicked back, took turns at the helm, and did our best to polish off the brew. Well, a couple hours and who knows how many miles later and I notice, despite my increasing carelessness that the ship's fuel gauge was startin' to look low. I said something to Barnaby, but he was face down in a puddle drunk off his ass. So I took it into my own hands to steer us West, toward shore. I cranked the wheel and 'fore long saw the beach front growing in front a me. I was so damn drunk that by the time I reached the shore, I nearly killed some bathers ramming the boat up on shore at full speed. Steering wheel gave me a bloody lip to boot. I looked around and saw that we'd landed on a public beach, crawlin' with tourists like ants on a log. Barnaby was laying on the deck all wide-eyed, not knowing a damn thing 'bout what was goin' on so I just grabbed him by the collar and pulled him out of the boat and started making it fast up the beach and onto the street. A sign advertising the best crab legs in the state told me we were in Rhode Island territory. Made no difference for me, I just wanted to put as much distance 'tween me and that boat as I could 'fore the authorities put two and two together. That's all for this post, my bowels are callin' me.